Reintroductions

Well, just about 2 months has flown by since the last time I've posted. Work has been extremely busy and planning a wedding hasn't been at the front of my cortex. So in case you might have forgotten...

I'm Marie. I'm a teacher in the Bay Area. When I'm not in the classroom (and I'm in the classroom a lot), I enjoy running, wine tasting, yoga (especially the hot/Bikram kind), cooking, reading, watching home improvement shows and model house hunting. 

this is his way of 'rebelling': standing on the closed side

My future husband (!!!) is Joel. He's a technical support rep for a cloud-based healthcare something something company. (Remember how no one on Friends knew exactly what Chandler did? Kind of the same thing over here...) Joel loves many things passionately: me, the Beach Boys, Giants baseball, comic books and super hero movies, and local history. He also likes to eat my cooking and look at model houses too.

after my first half marathon, 2010

We started dating in November of 2005. We lived in the same dorm: I was on the second floor, he was on the first. We actually saw each other for the first time at the Boardwalk in Santa Cruz: it was the first week of school in September and I saw him hanging out with a bunch of the girls from the dorm and thought I had no chance. It was a terrible night for me! Joel saw me all alone, and he thought I was beautiful. He made every effort to get to know and woo me when we got back to the dorm. Right before Thanksgiving break we were official! 

our first Giants game together (and my first game ever), 2006

We've done a lot of growing up together in the 8.5 years we've known each other. He supported me through several difficult deaths, gave me wine, snacks, and encouragement as I earned two degrees, was by my side when I hunted for my dream job, and helped me carry my mattress through city streets as I relocated during my junior, senior, and grad school years (staying sane during a move is no easy feat, and we've had some stupidly difficult moves). 

I've been there for Joel as he pursued his dreams, worked with him on his various projects both in and out of school, supported him through many tough job searches (graduating in 2007 right as the economy collapsed was not easy!), and celebrated his many successes.

We moved in together in August of 2010, when we both found jobs that would give us some stability. While marriage was definitely on our minds, we both wanted to wait until our careers were more stable: Joel was a contractor rather than a full employee and I was an assistant teacher rather than having my own classroom. 

Three years later, in March of  2013, Joel was offered his current position. Ooh, I was getting so excited! We were very close to landing dream jobs which meant marriage was on the horizon. I toiled and fought for my dream position at the school I was currently working at. After a rigorous interview process and 3 month long wait, the position was mine! By October of 2013 we were seriously perusing rings. Then in November, 8 years after we became official, Joel quietly asked me to marry him in our bedroom, after I helped him change his windshield wipers (you can't let go of a girl this talented!) 

We're currently procrastinating planning a fun, bright, romantic and casual wedding for 100 guests at the place we first laid eyes on each other: the Boardwalk in Santa Cruz. Planning has been a wee bit stressful as trying to stay within budget in this area in California seems to be near impossible, but I'm determined to keep things easy and breezy. Hopefully this post won't sit here alone for a couple of months and I'll be more regular with the updating!

DOC da What?!

DOC. A Day of Coordinator. Someone whose job it is to step in and say, "I got this..." all day on your wedding. For someone like me who's constantly worried about logistics, a Day of Coordinator sounds amazing.

Now I've really enjoyed wedding planning, and I have a pretty good idea of what I am doing and how things are going (or at least it's fun to pretend to think so!). I don't know if I need a whole wedding planner, but getting some help on the day of the rehearsal and the wedding would be so helpful, and would take any pressure off of my mom and me during the wedding.

I want my family and friends to enjoy our wedding! I don't want to assign people vendors to keep on top of or give my mom a bunch of envelopes with tips to be responsible for handing out later. If vendors have questions, I don't want to hear about them on my wedding day unless it is a dagnabbit emergency. A DOC would be responsible for being that point of contact person on our wedding day, answering all our vendor's questions and helping to set up and take down my wedding vision.

My mom and I both felt strongly about having a DOC, so I set off to find one available on our big day. I call up the first DOC. She sounds amazing! Her services include a meeting to walk through the venue, time at our rehearsal and all set up and tear down on our big day! The cost? $2000.

I'm sorry I'm not sorry, but $2000 for roughly 15 hours of work, TOTAL? That's not going to be happening. Also, after my wedding, I'm quitting teaching and becoming a DOC. 

I called around to some other coordinators and their prices were all similar. $1700, $1800...not much of a difference between $2000! We haven't found a videographer yet, so I really worry about splashing out this money. On the other hand, a DOC feels almost like a necessity to be our detail person on the big day.

Here I am, stuck between a rock and a hard place. If I had a larger wedding party, maybe this wouldn't be as much of an issue (I could be delegating!) but since it may be a small bridal party, I really don't want all of this falling on my mom and me. 

I'm going to keep looking around, but what are your thoughts? DOC or save that $$$?

Why Can't Tastings Happen Everyday?!

We had our tasting with our caterer today and um...it was awesome. I'm almost regretting getting it done so early, but it was either get it done now-ish or wait until November or December, which is crazy time for me as a teacher. With the wedding in February, I'm trying to get as much done earlier rather than later, so today's tasting worked out just fine.

We drove out to Watsonville where our caterer's kitchen is located. We also invited Joel's mom and sister because I can't make a decision for the life of me and Joel wanted their opinions as well. It was so fun and we all walked away wishing we could do tastings all the time.

We started off by tasting some of the passed appetizers.

Beggar's Purse with Fontina and Pine Nuts

Polenta Triangle with Caramelized Onions, Walnut and Bleu

At the bridal expo, we met up with this caterer (recommended by our venue) and they had samples of these delicious chicken with cheese skewer things that were so delicious. We were sold on having them as one of our three passed appetizers. When we tasted the beggar's purse and polenta triangle, we enjoyed both of them but thought they were pretty similar in taste profile, but the beggar's purse was easier to eat and a little bit more delicious. We wanted a lighter, less cheesy appetizer to be passed and our coordinator suggested the ceviche shooter. I wasn't convinced, but she brought out a couple for us to try and we were sold. 

Ceviche Shooter with a mini fork! How could we not?

The shooter has tilapia and shrimp and it is so light and cute-looking, too! Plus, as Joel's sister pointed out, we are getting married at the beach, so some seafood would be appropriate. 

Then we moved on to our vegetarian entree, butternut squash ravioli in a sage butter sauce. 

Yessssss...pasta...

Perfectly sweet, savory, tender and light. I think anyone looking for a veggie entree will be very happy. Did I mention we're also having grilled veggies and garlic mashed potatoes? Yes, I think we'll be all set for vegetarian guests! Next up, meats:

Tri Tip

 Tri Tip Sauces: Mushroom Port, BBQ, Peppercorn, and Au Jus

Salmon with Orange Glaze

The tri tip was delicious! Perfectly cooked and seasoned. We're serving it with the peppercorn sauce and horseradish. The salmon got mixed reviews: Joel's mom and sister liked it, especially the sauce, while Joel and I weren't sold on it. To us, it tasted a little fishy (yes, we know it's fish). We wanted a fish entree because of Joel's Kosher grandma, so we're trying to figure out what to do. Keep the salmon, and add a different sauce? Switch to halibut or sea bass? We'll see. The nice thing about our caterer is we can make changes to the menu up to two weeks before the wedding (maybe that's industry standard but... I don't know!)

So here's the final menu as it stands right now:

Appetizers:

• Stationary Cheese and Fruit Display
• Chicken with Fontina and Lemon Beurre Blanc Sauce on a Skewer
• Beggar's Purse
• Ceviche Shooter

Salad:

• Plated Caesar

Buffet:

• Grilled Tri Tip with Peppercorn Sauce
• Salmon with Orange Glaze
• Butternut Squash Ravioli in Sage Butter Sauce
• Roasted Garlic Mashed Potatoes
• Mixed Grilled Veggies

There's still a few things to decide. What type of plates to use (smaller stylish square or less attractive larger round), bread on the buffet or at the table (a $0.50 difference per person), linen colors, chair covers or Chivari (yeah, I might go there). 

But overall we are all pretty pleased as punch with our food choices. I know it may seem like a pretty standard 'wedding buffet', but to be honest, we like that. I don't think our guests want us to splash $100 on each plate of food (and we couldn't afford it if we wanted to!). We just want some tasty, simple food that will fill every one up, make them feel like they had a nice dinner, and not hold them back from hitting the dance floor. Hopefully our menu will help us achieve our goal!

Did you have a tasting for your wedding food? How did it go?!

I Love You, (Wo)Man

In the movie 'I Love You, Man', remember how sweet it was to see the Rashida Jones character being walked up the aisle by her best friends?

how sweet.

c/o Ace Showbiz

Yeah... I'm going to be more like the Paul Rudd character in that movie: totes friend-less.

c/o All Posters

After my third grade year, I moved two hours away from my school and started fourth grade in a new place. I had two year to make connections before I upped and moved to a new middle school, where none of my new friends were attending. I made close friends in middle and high school, but then I moved far, far away for college, and never kept super close ties with anyone.

When will my Shrek come along? I'll make them waffles...

I've kind of been friendless for the past 8 years I lived here. I'm not unhappy not having close friends (that's what JOEL is for! And the internet!!) and I definitely have people I count as 'friends', but I'm not close enough to anyone to ask someone to by my bridesmaid. It's a pickle that I've been thinking a lot about.

So what's a girl to do? Joel has guy friends that he's been close with since elementary school and he wants them to stand up beside him on his big day. I can't stop him from having groomsmen! But it's going to look pretty lopsided when the bride has got...no one. I have some girls in mind that I may ask, but I know that a lot of the big bridesmaid/bride traditions won't be the same. For example:

Pros of not having any bridesmaids/Only having a few:

• Not having to please a huge group of girls with an outfit choice 
• Saving beau coup $$$
• Less drama 

I'm okay with that and having a lopsided wedding party. The only person I care about standing up with me is Joel, and he's going to be by my side all day, and of course, for the rest of my life : )

Was picking a wedding party an easy choice? Did you have to pay someone to stand up for you? Or are you keeping it simple with no wedding party?

The 'Get In Shape, Girl!' Post

c/o someecards

basically.

c/o reactiongifs.com

I recently went for some routine blood work (routine! ha! It was the first time I had blood drawn in 18 years and it was an ordeal. You can ask Joel for more details...) and while everything came back normal, my doctor reported that I had slightly elevated levels of bad cholesterol. Exsqueeze me? Bad cholesterol? "Isn't that what older people experience..." I naively thought. Does this mean I'm an older person?!

It was a surprising result as I usually pride myself on being "healthy". I started to get interested in running as a hobby when I was a junior in college. I lived right by the beach and I would run right along the coast. I eventually had to move from that oasis, but I kept up my running habit, slogging miles almost daily. I also was an active member of the gym, taking spin and kickboxing classes. When Joel and I moved in together, I kept up the healthy habits. I signed up for Bikram yoga and half-marathons. I was on a health roll. 

Then last year I started a strenuous job search process that took a lot out of me. I would go to work for 9 hours, come home and immediately work on cover letters and lesson plans. My free time was consumed with job hunting. When I landed my dream job, all the hard work I was putting into the hunt was channeled into my work. I love my job and I want to do my best which often means 9.5 - 10 hour days on campus, plus more work when I get home. Working out just isn't on the agenda. While I love to cook for Joel and myself, we tend to love the comfort foods: lots of cheese, pasta, creamy soups and well... more cheese and pasta. Oh, and tacos. And dessert. And wine.

I want to look AND feel my best every day, including my wedding day. Being active and eating healthy make me feel better mentally, plus there's the added bonus of looking fly as well. I know that I can still commit 1000% to my job while making more time for myself. It's going to take some planning and commitment to follow through, but that's an important habit to develop. 

The best way to get back in shape? Make a plan and post it on the internet to keep yourself accountable! Here's my current plan:

Workouts:

• Sunday long runs: I have a half-marathon in April I'd like to not collapse at...
• 2 other run days: 1 day of sprints and 1 day of a casual jog of at least 3 miles
• 1 day of Body Attack at the gym (which means only putting in an 8 hour day at work)
• 1 day of Saturday boot camp OR 1 day of Bikram yoga

Eating:

• Oatmeal for breakfast! The commercials tell me it's supposed to lower your cholesterol, and I listen to my TV.
• A salad or juice a day to up the veggie intake
• No carbs at dinner and fruit for dessert only
• Wine only on the weekends... we'll see how that one goes

Seems like a pretty reasonable plan...just kidding, this is going to take a while to get used to! But with a dress hunt outing approaching and our engagement shoot in April, I want to feel a little better about myself and just working out more often will at least trigger some happier feelings in my brain, tricking myself into thinking I look better! Let's check in in 6 months and see how it's going. Hopefully I'll have some positive results to report.

Are you 'getting in shape for the big day'? Or are you happy with what your mama gave you, no need to add additional stress into wedding planning?

Another Easy Choice: Our Photographer

Continuing with our theme of going with our first instinct, our photographer was a super easy decision for us to make. It all actually started with Joel (he says he doesn't remember this, but it's true!) About a year ago, Joel sent me a photo that was from a couple's engagement shoot. It was at the Boardwalk, and Joel and I gushed about it, thinking that someday it could be us.

c/o Michael James Photo Studio

I was smitten! For the next year, I diligently stalked this guy's blog. I fell in love with all of his photos and his style. It was the perfect mix of photojournalism, which I wanted, with a touch of whimsy, which Joel wanted. The light Michael uses is beautiful, the colors are rich, and everyone looks like his/her best self. 

c/o Michael James Photo Studio

 c/o Michael James Photo Studio

 c/o Michael James Photo Studio

c/o Michael James Photo Studio

When we first got engaged, I knew I had to have Michael photograph our wedding. I did my due diligence and looked around at other Bay Area photographers, but none of them grabbed my attention the way Michael did. Plus, he was close to fitting in our budget (ha ha, sorry budget...)!

c/o Michael James Photo Studio

 c/o Michael James Photo Studio

The funny thing is, when I first emailed Michael and told him where we were planning on getting hitched he was ecstatic! He said he had just shot an engagement shoot at the Boardwalk and a wedding was taking place at the Grove the same day. He said he always had wanted to shoot at the Grove and hadn't had a chance yet. I was like, "Guess what, Michael?! Joel and I are your key to photograph there!"

Michael has been awesome to communicate with via email and has been very thorough in answering all our questions (high-res vs full-res? what does that mean?!? do we need it?!?!) plus he's very warm, even through online communication. That's not easy!

c/o Michael James Photo Studio

c/o Michael James Photo Studio

I am really excited to work with Michael. Our engagement shoot will be sometime in the spring. I am not very photogenic at. all. and as much as I'm dreading an hour of trying to take a good picture of my face, I think Michael is going to do an amazing job!

Did you have a photographer 'crush' from before you were engaged? Or did you have a huge search to find 'the one'? 

Now Where Are We?...

It's official! We have 363 days until our wedding! Or as you may say:

A year always seemed like the perfect amount of time to plan a wedding, and I think most of the folks in the industry agree. Over a year is hard to plan because some vendors don't book that early and less than a year (6 months) has vendors all booked up and feeling rushed. Our Rabbi flat out told us that he wouldn't marry us if we came to him 6 months before. Yikes. I certainly don't want to rush anyone! My planning mantra as of late has been: pick something you like, don't ask questions or compare, and get the 'ish locked down in a contract ASAP!

Jean Ralphio is like, 'Girl, celebrate! You just signed away another $2000 deposit!'

In the past month we have gone pretty far in our relationships with some of our main contractors. Here's where we stand:

• Venue is booked! 2/15/15. We're still working on squaring away the timing because here's my other theme of this wedding (sing it in a sing-song voice): logistics suck! Trying to figure out when we can start decorating and getting set up and when the door should open for guests and when I'm actually going to walk down the aisle is proving to be more tricky than I ever imagined. I foresee some spreadsheets and flowcharts...
• We have a deposit and contract ready to be sent to our caterer! This is a caterer who frequently does weddings at our venue, so I was like, 'Cool. Sign us up!'. They're affordable, reputable, nice, they have tasty buffet options and I think they will be awesome at organizing the dreaded buffet logistics. May the odds be ever in their favor. 
• We'll be meeting with the floral/decorating company that is recommended by our venue in March. I can't wait to hear how expensive all my floral desires will be during my Valentine's Day weekend wedding...
• We have a photographer! Another easy choice that probably deserves his own post. Joel actually showed me his pictures first a few years ago and I've been smitten ever since. So like any good animal of prey, I stalked him and then lunged, and wouldn't you know it? He's been looking to photograph a wedding at our very venue. It was written in the stars... the photographer would be OURS.

I feel pretty ok about where we are right now in our planning process. I have the week off from school to get some more plans into motion. I need to see if we can get a videographer ready, pick out some save the dates, schedule our engagement shoot and maybe look into a DOC. Through all of this planning kerfluffle, what am I using to organize all the appointments and deadlines?

The Holy Grail: My May Book

The May Book has been a godsend in terms of recording all of the appointments and how they collide with both Joel's availability and my work availability. Usually, I'm a 'keep it in my head' girl, but wedding planning is a whole new ball game. It's my crucial piece of sporting equipment, like a helmet or a jock strap, that protects me from loosing my cool. My next post will go into more of my 'A Beautiful Mind' organization methods. 

Did you have any big vendors that you KNEW you wanted to use, so you just booked 'em? No second glances or comparisons? Should we have compared more?! ::gulp::